Me: hey Roomie, where’s the mop?
Roomie: why? What happened?
Me: there was an accident. Nothing serious.
Roomie: I think it’s in the closet across from the bathroom.
Me: I’ll look.
Roomie: wasn’t Rick coming over?
Me: yeah, well, that didn’t go so well.
Roomie: what? Did something happen?
Me: eh. He cheated on me
Roomie: that bitch!
Me: yeah. With Marcus.
Ronnie: fuck. That bastard? He’s evil. That is so low
Me: lol. Yeah. He is. Oh. Found the mop.
Roomie: did you guys break up? I hope so.
Me: oh yes. Hey, do we have any big garbage bags?